Ten K One Writing

The other day, I was stuck.  I was trying to plug my services to the owner of a toy shop and was, quite frankly, doing a terrible job.  She sold eco-friendly, no-icky-chemicals products at a significant price increase from their petroleum-derived brethren.  She knew her product was great, knew the people that she was looking for, knew the product was useful to them, and that was that.  No need to hire some kind of expensive “business writer” to connect the dots.  She could pick up a pencil on her own, thanks very much.

In fact, this one was a tough customer all around.  I’d had to explain just what I did before we met, that it was more about mental pen-chewing and repeated paragraph-hacking than fine print and trademark law.  Once I’d explained that, I’d offered to stop by to talk about our businesses, and now, she was giving me The Shrug.

Now, I’m OK with The Shrug.  Potential clients are free to shrug as hard as they want.  I don’t, on principle, do hard sells, on the principle that eww.  But I wanted to let her know just what she was declining before I packed up and headed home.  Really spell it out, as it was clear I wasn’t getting the message across very well.  I knew that my product was great, knew the people I was looking for, and that my product was useful.  Easy, usually.  People love my stuff.  But I was faltering here.

Really, we were having the same problem.

Who cares?

If she was shrugging at my hand-waving, grunts and whistles about newsletters and product descriptions, imagine the wave of shrugs she’d be facing with her stuff.  The European-sewn bears.  The phthalate-free line of bottles.  The extra-large price tags.  Sure, many people would walk in and think paying $300 for a bisphenol-A-free rocking horse was a deal.  Their shoulders wouldn’t move an inch.  Those folks looked your store up on Google four hours ago and already drove 45 minutes to find you, and they’re wondering if you do eco-friendly gift-wrap.  OK, well done, but what about those other people?  The ones who wander in and don’t know an eco-friendly toy from one they’d pick up somewhere else.  Quick now!  They see that $300 rocking horse and go, “Three hundred for a fucking rocking horse?”  Shrug. Come on, we’re losing ‘em…Think of something!  Aaaaand…there’s the exit.  Total time: about 30 seconds.

Those people are the ones who need what a copywriter can give them: the antidote to The Shrug.  We take your enthusiasm for your product and make it contagious, giving the right information in the right way.  Bisphenol-A?  A lot of people have no idea what that creepy stuff is.  So what if it’s not in your rocking horse?  Go ahead, jot it down on the display.  Tell people who come in.  Some people will get it, and the rest, they’ll shrug. How are they supposed to know that it’s suspected to cause a number of health issues, especially around children?  Getting it out of their kid’s bedroom is something many of your Shruggers would probably be interested in, but not until you have a way to tell them why.  In under 30 seconds.

That’s why you hire yourself a good copywriter.  What I shoulda said.